September 11, 2004
ISIS Crank Problem
The bottom bracket of my Trek Liquid 20 is making a cracking noise. My first guess, and the Barnett Guide's advice is that it's most likely a loose crank. (This has happened to me before on other bikes).
Today I decided to remove the cranks and then re-tighten them. In preperation, I even bought a torque wrench so that I can tighten the cranks to the correct specification.
Not thinking clearly, I removed the cranks from the wrong Liquid 20. Didn't really matter, I'll regrease and re-tighten them too. But then I realized I'd made another mistake. When I bought the torque wrench I forgot to get a 3/8" square to 8mm allen key socket. The 8mm allen key is needed to remove the crank bolt that holds the crank tight against the splines of the bottom bracket. This precludes me from retightening the cranks to the correct torque.
Oh well, I might as well remove the cranks from the second (creaking) bike. First one came off fine. The second one was a serious nuisance. For some reason I couldn't get good purchase and it wouldn't budge. Then I noticed that the allen wrench was slipping. Before long I can see that the allen key head of the bolt is rounded off and I can't get any purchase on the bolt. It's stranded. I'm screwed.
I took the bike to a local bikeshop that seems happy to get down and dirty. After I refused the guy's offer to "do a total rebuild of the bike -- take it all apart put it all back" (it doesn't need it) I think he grew cold on me. And when I came back thirty minutes later said it was impossibly stuck and my best bet was to chisel it out. For heaven's sakes.
I've seen references to adjustable pin spanners, but the torque necessary to break free the crank bolt from the bottom bracket is immense. I can't imagine them standing up to the task.
So two questions?
1) How do I get this bolt out? Currently my only idea is to have someone weld a socket directly on the bolt that I can torque free.
2) Where do I find a replacement crank bolt?
Update
September 09, 2004
The Thousand Years Is Over!
Yes, I admit, I goaded Stas into watching Millennium. So I guess I got what I deserved when he gave it a fairly scathing review.
I'm not sure how many episodes he's watched. I gave him ed2k links mostly for season one shows which are generally one-off monster/serial killer stories, and not much conspiracy 'arc' (the stuff the freaks like to obsess over).
By now I've seen several of the stories more related to the Millennium Group and its creepy work. I find it suffers the same problems The X-Files and even Northern Exposure struggled with: they started a story not knowing how it would finish.
Maybe Charles Dickens could start a serialized story without an ending in mind, but apparently TV writers cannot. Perhaps it's the continual pressure of ratings, perhaps it's having too many writers sharing duties for one show, or even just actors being pains in the ass. Whatever it is, the stories deteriorate and grow more convoluted each season.
Lance Henriksen complained about this problem, "The second season I wasn't as crazy about," he says. "The third I thought was pretty wild though as I didn't know where it was going, ever. The first season is the season I liked the most, because it was Chris Carter doing it and he had a real control over it. He had his hand on the helm in other words. "
But let's move on. I got tired of obsessive fandom a long time ago. My real complaint began, ten years ago, in my dingy efficiency apartment in College Station Texas, watching Millenium on a fourteen inch television plugged into an aerial, "what the fuck did that guy just say? What the fuck just happened -- this screen is so dark I coudn't see," week after week after week.
You'd think nearly ten years later, played on an expensive LCD monitor with frame-by-frame digital playback and a giant surround sound system the problem would be solved. Alas no, it's still "what the fuck did that guy just say? What the fuck just happened -- this screen is so dark I coudn't see."
Perhaps I like the show more than Stas because I expect so little out of television anyway. I think he was a bit righteous though, frequently comparing Millennium to the X-Files. I also downloaded the X-Files pilot and it sucked too! It was a bland template for many X-Files episodes to come, and the acting was quite wooden.
Stas would have done much better to watch Maranatha, the episode I've most enjoyed. It's the best blend of conspiracy, spookiness, and coolness they've managed. (Maybe I'm misguiding Stas again -- I'm sure he'll hate all the bad Russian stereotypes, but I wouldn't know any better)
Stas also didn't do justice to the dialogue Frank's capable of. Frank had one of perhaps the best-delivered lines in television ever:
- Agent Devlin: Everybody's got a theory on the increasing violence in our society.
Agent Emmerich: My wife thinks it's the artificial hormones in beef.
Agent Devlin: What's your take?
Frank Black: [as deadpan as it gets] I don't think it's the beef.
Stas complains about the many flat, forgettable characters. He must never have seen the episode, "Lamentations," or else he would have complained about the incredibly shabby Hannibal Lechter ripoff character 'Dr Ephraim Fabricant."
And why didn't Stas mention Peter Watts? All his foibles aside, you've got to love that mustache!
And perhaps the most shameful shortcoming in his review? He made fun of poor Mike Atkins for finding himself stuck in the human-size microwave oven!
What Stas neglects to tell us is that Mike Atkins is actually his father!
Case Closed.
Or as they'd say in The Group,
This is who we are.
September 03, 2004
Spookier than the X-Files
Whether it's true or not, this little video is the spookiest thing I've seen since the X-Files was still fresh and didn't suck.
update (1/15/05): here is a nice debunking site.
Phone Call From a Felon
- Michael Alig: OH! Did I ever explain what a "shit room" is?
James St. James: No!
Michael: OK ? in the visiting room or just in general, when they suspect you of having drugs inside of you, because that's how a lot of people get drugs in here, they swallow them in the visiting room or shove it up their butt.
James: That's hot.
Michael: I know.